


Revelation

by Iresposts



Series: Cody family album [2]
Category: Animal Kingdom (TV)
Genre: M/M, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-27 23:47:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16712356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iresposts/pseuds/Iresposts
Summary: Adrian tells Deran of how he realized he was gay. Deran does the same, but it's a harder, bitter story.Please note this fic has young Deran desiring an older male original character.





	Revelation

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Stolen cigarettes](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/434914) by theninjazebra. 



> This story is a joint effort with @theninjazebra. Thanks also to @dixiethumbelina for your suggestions.

  **Revelation**

It was close and airless up in the space under the roof of the bar. Another hot summer’s day, and the weak A/C only sometimes made it up to where they were.

Deran slumped forward onto Adrian’s back as soon as he finished coming. They were both drenched, chest and limbs sticking together. Adrian gave him a couple of seconds before he roughly pushed Deran off him by rolling over, and their wet skin squeaked and clung as they separated. They both lay on their backs for a moment before Deran got enough energy to deal with the condom.

“Why do I always end up in the wet spot?” Adrian asked. He pushed his damp hair off his eyes.

“Because it’s almost always your wet spot,” Deran said amiably. He was in a good mood. “Also, I don’t think there is a dry spot on this mattress at all today.” He shifted a little. The stale sheets were moist under him. Deran thought he should probably take them to the laundromat sometime soon. He just never got around to it. But then again, he’d never had men up here so it kind of hadn’t mattered until now.

Adrian kept coming back and Deran was starting to hope, but cautiously. He wanted this man, he always had, but he still wasn’t sure that what he had to give, even now, would be enough. Between them lay all the times when he’d chosen Smurf.

“Guess who I saw today?” Adrian didn’t bother to wait for Deran’s answer. “Gabriel Sanchez.”

“Who?”

“Just like the hottest guy in our school back in the day. Well, it was him and Raphael and Michael. The trio of archangels that all the girls had ginormous crushes on. But it was just Gabriel today at the grocery store with his kid.”

“I don’t remember him at all but yeah, the other two were pretty good looking,” said Deran.

“Oh god. Yes, Gabriel really did it for me, his black hair, and those eyes…. I swear I spent my freshman year just like _dying_ in the locker room if he was around and desperately hoping I wouldn’t get an erection. He used to walk around shirtless a lot.” Adrian laughed. “I swear it was his lean tan chest made me go, yep, I’m gay.”

Deran felt the old feeling of being inadequate rise. Gabriel, huh? Deran couldn’t help himself, he raised himself on one elbow, reached over and traced Adrian’s pecs with one hand, possessively. He just loved how built Adrian was, but he’d always had a thing for that. A big heavy chest, and a firm ass to fuck, and knowing that these men let him into their bodies because _he_ wanted it. Adrian wanted him like that, and that was that. Gabriel was in the past.

“How did _you_ know?” Adrian’s eyes met his. “How did you know you were gay?”

Deran reared back a little, hand now motionless on Adrian’s chest. He really should have expected the question. Deran looked away, eyes restlessly falling on the brown cardboard boxes of clothes, the stainless-steel cake bowl holding his toiletries, the edge of the mattress, anywhere but at Adrian. When he finally did meet his eyes, Adrian looked like he was about to say something, something that might bring it back into the room, in his bar and he didn’t want that. It wasn’t welcome in this space that was finally just his.

“I kind of always knew I guess?” Deran tried, hoping that it would be enough.

“You were stealing Smurf’s cigarettes and—”

Deran remembered now. He’d forgotten he’d said even that much to Adrian. He’d never finished the story in Belize because they had been too excited discovering each other’s bodies in the light, what worked, what didn’t, sometimes fumbling, but becoming surer with each time they did. It had been furtive before that because _reasons_.

Deran lay back down again, facing the roof.

Adrian turned on his side to look at Deran. Deran could feel it, and he cringed a little, but he kept his eyes on the exposed rafters, attention fixed on the corner where the silver insulation was coming away, trailing cottony fluff. He wasn’t even sure why he felt so cornered. “Deran?” Adrian said his name and Deran started.

“Yeah?” Deran went for casual, like his heart wasn’t beating awkwardly in his chest, the pleasant post-orgasm feeling gone. He finally turned onto his side too, facing Adrian.

“It’s OK dude, I didn’t realize—” Adrian’s eyes were wide, black pupils taking over the dark blue. Deran was familiar with it, it was the look that meant that they were onto something that they didn’t talk about. There were a lot of those and suddenly Deran was sick of it and it didn’t really matter now. He wasn’t a kid, and he didn’t even fucking live there anymore. He’d never told anyone and like it wasn’t really bad and it had kind of made him who he was. He could share that with Adrian, because maybe now, this time, they could make whatever they had into something like a normal relationship.

“I’d gone to school and like made it to homeroom and then couldn’t be bothered. And you know Smurf, she didn’t really care what us kids did.” Deran shrugged. “The truancy officer nearly caught me that day, but they could issue as many tickets as they liked, but Smurf always got me off,” Deran smiled to himself, remembering. “She was really good at that, just told them whatever they wanted to hear, and the days I played hooky just vanished off the computer system. I think she even slept with one once who came to the house.”

Deran laughed but Adrian didn’t.

Deran thought that he looked slightly sick like he didn’t want to hear the story after all. “So, Smurf was out watering the garden that morning because it was a really hot day for fall, with the Santa Ana winds coming through. I could hear the hose and the water pattering onto the ground, and it sounded loud.” Adrian was listening, but tense, so Deran knew he had to make it sound ordinary. “So, I was going through her purse, looking for those cigarettes, and this guy she has over comes into the kitchen, like completely naked, holding a cup of coffee.”

_He’d seen him the night before, his ass pumping up and down on top of Smurf, because the door to her bedroom had been slightly ajar. Although he’d never admitted it at the time, he’d probably skipped school that day in case he could see him again. Because that ass – he’d known it was spectacular – was off the charts. It had brought it close to him what Smurf wanted from the men she had._

Deran breathed out shakily, almost back in the moment, feeling hot and cold and tingly.

“He looks at me and goes ‘You’re Smurf’s kid, right?’ and he doesn’t give a shit that he’s naked, just really confident in his body, you know? Like his natural state is like that, with his dick hanging out. And it’s the first time I’ve kind of seen a dude’s body like that – in front of me, you know? Like all of him?” Adrian was nodding like he understood.

“The whole person and it’s chest and hands and legs, but all at the same time, all together?” Adrian said.

“Yeah, and not like in porn because you’re not looking at them as people, you’re looking at their cocks or their ass like in isolation, and it’s like they kind of exist by themselves—” Deran tried to explain, but he was cut off by Adrian who started chuckling.

“Sorry Deran, you’ve given me this image of like detached cocks just singing and dancing the cha cha,” Adrian said, breaking up the intensity. Deran knew why, sometimes Adrian said he wanted to know, but Deran knew if he said anything real it would freak him out – badly. No one wanted to hear shit like that. But Deran wanted him to listen to this story, he didn’t really know why, maybe just because he’d already started and he wanted to finish it.

“So, anyway I’m just looking at him, and I can’t look away. And I’m really turned on in a way I haven’t been before, and I can feel it all happening, and I just don’t know what to do, so all I can do is watch him. He looks like a god, all smooth muscles and the way the light hits his body hair just makes him look like he’s glowing.”

_Surfer dude’s cock had come to life, and Deran had crushed his stolen cigarettes in his hand._

“He had this really broad chest, really defined. He looked like a statue, one of those ones, you know?”

“Yeah, I know,” said Adrian.

Deran thought that Adrian looked like that sometimes, all white carved marble but alive and so touchable. He’d loved it when Adrian had bulked up in their late teens, watching his friend grow from boy to man with every session at the gym. But those protein shakes! Gross on the guts and the sex as a result had been kind of messy. But the results, wow. Deran ran his hand down Adrian’s chest and to his belly.

“We looked at each other for a while, and I’m kind of trying to keep my eyes on his face but like sucking at it, so like my eyes kind of drift down to his hands and I imagine them on me. Then onto his chest and I want to hold him. Most of the time I was just looking at his dick, I think. And I want to touch it and have it in my hands. My mouth kind of waters at the thought of sucking him off.” Deran paused and took a deep breath. “Then I have this moment – like snap and everything falls into place – and I know that I want it. I want him and that’s what I like. Pussy is soft and wet, but he’s what I want, and I knew then that it wouldn't change.” Deran blinked coming back to the present. “So that’s how I knew I was gay.”

“How old were you dude?” Adrian asked gently.

Deran shrugged.

_Surfer dude had come towards Deran and crowded him against the kitchen island. He’d put down his coffee cup near Smurf’s purse. He’d smiled kind of wickedly, but it had been oddly gentle at the same time. He’d crooked his finger, ‘come on’ and had turned around and walked back to the living room. Deran had followed, stopping a couple of feet away as the man made himself comfortable on the couch, facing Deran. His legs had opened, and his hand had gone to his cock._

_He’d held Deran’s eyes as he’d slowly tugged at his dick, wrist action smooth, with a swirl at the end around the tip. Just that over and over again, pace even and slow. It had felt like hours to Deran, in the cool blue darkness with the curtains shutting out the white daylight, a moment out of time. His cock had been interested, tenting his shorts, and he’d been boiling in his hoodie, sweat trickling down his ribs and damp on his lower back. He didn’t know what he wanted to do, run away or do the same, just get off, and then the water outside had stopped, and he’d come back to himself, horrified._

_The sliding door had opened letting in a blast of hot air and Smurf. ‘What are you doing here baby?’ She had come towards him and instinct had taken over. Escape. ‘Where are you going?’_

_‘School! I’m late bye!’_

_He’d pushed past her and run and hadn’t looked back. To this day he didn’t know what Smurf had seen._

“How old were you Deran?” Adrian asked again, his voice cracking.

Deran’s breathing was off, and he could feel himself getting really numb. He sucked in a deep breath and reminded himself that he was at _his_ bar, with _his_ Adrian, and that he didn’t have to feel like this. Then Deran gave up his dignity and reached for Adrian, and then they were plastered to each other, both breathing fast.

Adrian didn’t ask any more questions.


End file.
